Welcome to Pensive Leaves!

    Hello, and welcome to Pensive Leaves! Whether you weathered the recesses of the internet to reach these digital shores by course of intent, or perhaps landed here by accident - the result of some algorithmic clicking induced rabbit hole, you've made it! But, where is that? And, just what exactly is Pensive Leaves? That question I can answer easy enough, but it's perhaps the better question, 'what are pensive leaves', that requires more explanation.

    I'm Garrett, and Pensive Leaves is simply a place for me to share with you, dear reader, fragments, reflections and vignettes of life that intrigue me. Here you'll find anything from poems to musings old and new, and it is my hope that you will also find something that inspires the soul and incites further creativity. My intent with this blog is to be just as much an outlet for myself as it is for you so that we may find in each other kindred spirits. 

    I've always been passionate about the humanities, but since graduating in 2018 with a bachelors in the liberal arts, I haven't since had a proper outlet for writing, for journaling, and for creating. I have, however, been left with a heightened awareness of my ideas and an even higher awareness of my inaction - the prodigal gifts of a philosophical education. Being a perfectionist, I am often so mentally paralyzed by the dreaming up of an end goal for a project that I never leave any room for starting, and I'll have nothing to show for my hours of caffeine induced episodes of rumination and revelation. After spending considerable time in stimulation with my beloved books, coffee, and pipe tobaccos, I never give myself enough credit to begin.

    To overcome this chronic hurdle of overthinking I realized I needed to reframe the way I looked at thoughts. Instead of seeing them as lofty and unattainable, they must be kicked off their pedestal. They must be demystified, understated, and entirely rebranded - as pensive leaves; poetic, and effective.

    In the vein of the Buddhist practice of meditation, my assumption is that the proper way to approach thoughts and ideas are rather like clouds. Dr Lillian Nejad from insighttimer.com says

"By observing your thoughts as if they are clouds in the sky, you can learn something about the nature of your mind: that your thoughts come and go (if you let them), that you don’t have to react to them, or believe them, or judge them, or get caught up with them. You can just notice them and let them drift by."

So much of what makes the trope of thinker anguish is not the thought itself, but also the futility of trying to grasp it by the neck and magically wring it into its fully fleshed form before it's had time to come to fruition. She goes on to say,

"When you are mindful, you learn that the present moment is always changing. Accepting what is, and what you are experiencing, is a pathway to change and to freedom from suffering."

    So then, 

    I choose to be free from the suffering of stagnation. To let thoughts drift in as they may, and to not be afraid of them. To not let concern over classification and organization stop me from appreciating each's own unique beauty, but, like clouds, to entertain them as they come as if falling leaves. Just as the wind on a blustery autumn day stirs them from the branches in a flurry, such is the nature of the mind. Taken as a whole, the blizzard of color is too dazzling a display to render me capable of any meaningful action other than dumbstruck awe, but by looking at each leaf for what it is, engaging is made immediately simple.

From the Tree of Life

leaves they spring forth,

and when ripe and mature 

they fall to the Earth. 

Catch one if you like,

and venture record

a single reflection

it will afford.

They tell us to look

at the forest for the trees,

but yet never to see

the tree for its leaves.

Though, from forest to trees 

and from branches to leaves

It's leaves that're the heart

of the whole work of art

So tread lightly, take care

and give it a start,

capture some leaves and 

wisdom impart.

    Please, make yourself at home. I'm so glad you're here! Settle in, get cozy, grab a mug of your favorite warm elixir, and if you'd like, join me in this practice of penning leaves of thought. Here's to many grand discussions! O where the winds will take us...

- Garrett